No, I’m not answering the millennium question “What is love?” (the song’s pretty good tho).

And no, I’m not here to teach you how to be good at love consultation either.

This is a story that involved my close group of friends (including me). A story so goddamn morbid we would rather it does not happen again. I say that because we don’t have the luxury of forgetting it.

There was this girl. She was our classmate in high school. We weren’t exactly close friends, but we were on amicable terms (do not ask me why I prefer the term diplomatic instead). We have a Discord server to hang out, and she’s in there. She’s not very active tho, only popping up every now and then.

Except, every time she pops up, we add a new morbid tale to the collection.

You see, after high school, we attended different universities. It was then, that she began to have a crush on a dude studying at a different uni. That dude was also our high school classmate, and we also were on amicable terms with him. But she didn’t get that luxury. So, what did she do?

She consulted us. On how to approach him, how to get his attention, etc. You know, the usuals.

Being the good friends that we were (and we were bored af at the time as well), we decided to help her out. Answered her questions, gave her advice, showed her da wae (or at least what we believed to be da wae).

We each gave our own perspective, and coordinated with each other. We did a damn fine job on that.

And yet.

“You should do this thing.” - “But what if he doesn’t like it?”

“Do not do this thing.” - Proceeds to do the exact opposite.

“Why the heck did you go with this obviously dumb idea?” - “I don’t know…”

“What’s the most important thing to you right now?” - “I have no idea…”

“Do you want to do this or not?” - “I’m… not sure…”

With every new question, our patience grew thin. Every advice of ours was met with a response that barely had an ounce of logic in it. Eventually our patience grew so goddamn thin that we each and all screamed internally.

But we still tried our best to hear her out and give her advice. That whole charade went on for almost a full year until I think she just lost interest in the dude.

All of that, for nothing. Amazing.

So, what’s the lesson here?

When engaging in a romantic relationship (or trying to), use your damn head before giving in to your heart.

If you haven’t heard about it, there’s this thing called human psychology. That thing can allow you to come up with a good plan to engage with someone. You make use of psychology with your damn head. You don’t make use of psychology with your heart.

“But love is supposed to be about the heart…”

Bullshit. You don’t achieve anything without using your head. Logic sets up the foundation of everything. Only then do you give in to your heart, knowing a strong foundation is already there.

In the case of love, you start out as friends. As good friends. Friends that can depend on each other. Only then do you consider taking things to the next step. You do not speedrun the damn process.

Anyways, I didn’t recall all of this because I was thinking about love.

I recalled all of this because I was listening to this soundtrack. You can see where “love consultation” came from.

It’s a really good track. Give it a try.